Woke up this morning alone.
I have woken up alone every single morning for the past 8 years now. Without one exception.
Somehow I just don't feel I am part of the world's sexual parade. Everyone is enjoying the slow motion orgy, and I am not invited.
For most of my adulthood I accepted this as my lot in life, that I was not supposed to enjoy my sexuality or even my sensuality, at least not so far as having another person involved.
Now, I am terribly, menacingly frustrated by it. Makes me want to give up and have the pain stop.
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